Otherish or Otherless

So here's a hypothesis:
Every choice we make is based on what will bring us the decision makers more joy (or less pain).

What I mean is this: Selfishness and selflessness don't revolve around yourself at all, but rather what you do for other people. People who are selfish and people who are selfless both are acting and making decisions based on what they think will bring themselves the most joy. The difference lies in whether that joy includes other people or not. Maybe we should talk about people being otherish and otherless.

Here's where all this came from.

Clearly, selfish (otherless) acts can be seen as bringing the selfish person joy, but what about unselfish acts?

First, let's look at coercion/doing good things with a crap attitude. (i.e. We do something because someone else wants us to do it.) For example, I go see a chick flick because my wife wants me to go with her. But really I decide to go because I'd rather endure the film than have an argument, or maybe because next time I get to choose. Or I tithe, but only because I'm supposed to. So I'm doing a good thing, but I chose to do it because I'd rather lose the money than lose the eternal rewards. Or I serve someone, but I do it because I'd rather have people think highly of me than have my time back.

Second, we give/serve, and we do it with a great attitude. But the real reason why we chose to do it is because we enjoy giving/serving others than keeping our money/time/sweat to ourselves.

Challenge: try to come up with a scenario in which a person can possibly make a choice that will not bring more joy/less pain to the decision maker, without disregarding the emotional effects of the choice.

Thanks

I am so grateful that God has given me more than I need. It is such a great and enjoyable thing to be able to share with others, as opposed to being God's charity.